Anger is something we all must deal with, a toxic disease that spreads like wildfire. Something that a lot of times isn't even under our control once it gets started. Frustration is a way of life, nothing is ever going to go exactly how we planned. We must learn to be fluid and flexible and adaptable or we will only suffer under the stress and weight of anger and guilt. When we hold anger in we only destroy ourselves, and when we express anger in the wrong way we hurt all of those around us. The hard part comes when we can't even tell what we are doing. Anger is irrational, you're making yourself upset over something you can't change now whatever it is. All you can do is learn to adapt. You have no control over your surroundings, and there are going to be so many times that those surroundings provoke a negative response from you. My problem comes because I carry my anger inside and don't let it out or talk to anyone about it and then it just boils over in one big mess. By that time I have no control over what I am saying or doing, my thoughts race and rational thinking is out the window. Once that starts it becomes very hard to catch myself because how can you catch yourself when you can't even think right? The trick is catching those thoughts when they first pop up and dealing with them then, or taking the time to deal with them before they become something unmanageable and you get even more upset. There are so many outlets out there. I love to write, it's a way I let go of all the stress and anger inside. Sometimes though that isn't enough. I need something to release before it explodes. I've found one good thing is walking or hiking. Use some energy and get outside. Clear your mind and release some endorphins. Go by yourself and reflect and meditate or go with a friend or partner. The key is to get it out. Express how you feel in a way you can control, that way your emotions will never control you. For me, when the anger really gets going the only thing that makes it better is getting a tattoo. I always get things that have obvious importance to me, but something about the pain of the needle and the release is intoxicating. After my two tattoos last night I felt like a weight was off my chest and shoulders. I was walking down Sunset Boulevard on air and this morning when I woke up I wasn't angry or frustrated at all. I haven't been in a bad mood all day because I don't have those pent up feelings anymore. I decided to get the Cancer constellation, the stars in the sky when I was born, and the symbol for mindfulness on my wrist. I found the mindfulness symbol just yesterday but it is so perfect. I've wasted most of my life, I never live in the present because I am constantly worried or stressed about what has or what will happen. I needed something to remind me to stay in the here and now. So I put it right under the word Joy because I thought true Joy can only come with mindfulness. I used the pain to help channel all the anger and frustration I've been feeling lately. I must say that I feel so much better now, and that mindfulness symbol has really had an impact on my thinking.
Here's what the symbol means:
"This symbol is presented like a physical representation of present moment.
Vertical forms represent time – past and future. Horizontal forms represent space – 360 degrees. And the one is always in the center – being here and now – perfect equanimity.
Secondly, you can see a symbol of a water drop. This is the most often used metaphor to represent the idea of mindfulness. Only this water drop symbol is presented in a kind of mirrored way. But do not think about it, because as mentioned above, this is time – past and future, both are illusions, stay centered in the present."
http://www.radicalcourse.com/here-and-now-symbol-present-moment-awareness/
How perfect and how amazing. I knew it was the right choice. The whole time I was sitting there I was channeling all my negative thoughts and feelings through that tiny needle. While you may not like pain or be able to tolerate needles, look for and find something that speaks to you. Get those negative thoughts out before they poison you. Talk to someone, talk to your dog, talk to youself. Find a way to remind yourself to be mindful and present in the here and now because one thing is for sure, with bottled up anger there is no room for joy and no chance of healing.
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