"The Wisdom of Joy From Jerry" #3 - My Grandson Daniel

Do you know what really brings joy to my life? After having 6 kids and 6 grandkids I haven't, until now, had the opportunity nor the time to really be there every step of the way for one of them as they grew up. Retirement has its benefits. Three, and sometimes more, days a week I watch my grandson Daniel. We spend most of the day together, at least half of it alone. He's my little buddy. It's amazing to see the rate of development of the human mind and witness it's exponential experimental growth. It is phenomenal to be able to witness something like that. He is two, going on three here in June. He's been talking for a while now, but to witness him go from sounds to individual words to sentences and where he is now is something they will always amaze me. It is interesting, if you listen closely they speak in thoughts instead of sentences or formed ideas. You can literally listen to them work things out. 

There are times Daniel will just look at me out of the corner of his eyes like a little miniature adult, as if he knows exactly what I'm thinking. Watching him play brings me so much joy, we have a lot of fun together. He loves playing with his new Jet Planes. He will pick them up, lift them high in the air and run around telling everyone that the Jet Planes are coming and to watch their ears. Then he will make his Jet Engine sounds as he maneuvers them all over the house. The greatest learning curve in life is supposed to be somewhere around three or so until about age seven. If he is this amazing now I can't fathom the strides he is about to take, and so quickly at that. I can sit and have a conversation with him now, it's unbelievable; no more babytalk. It is also one of the greatest gifts I never would have thought to ask for. After always being so busy and taken up with work being retired is welcome and freeing. I never thought I would be able to spend that free time with my little guy Daniel. He turns three in less than a month and as my wife retires at the end of the month there will be more people around in the mornings and afternoons. Not that I don't love that as well, but I really do treasure and cherish those moments we had and have between us. It's not often in life you get an opportunity like that, an opportunity to really connect with and help shape someone. It's a two way street as well, as you shape someone else they shape you as well. Having Daniel brings me so much Joy and the opportunity to be there for him gives me more Joy than almost anything else. I thank God everyday for all of my kids and grandkids and my wife; family is everything in the end, when you are there for each other it help lifts everyone up and promotes growth and learning which fosters hope and courage leading to strength. Human beings are amazing and intricate creatures; the fact alone that we are living, that the billions and billions of things necessary for our survival go right at the right time and all together, is reason enough to bring all of us Joy. We are living. Don't ever forget that, it's something that is surprisingly easily forgotten. 

Buddhist Meditation Beads = Mala Beads - 108 Beads, 1 Mantra

In my next step on my way to wholeness and being Joyful I went out today to get a set of Buddhist Meditation Beads. I have been wanting some for awhile and all the ones I could find were online and I didn't want to have to wait the week and a half to get them. So on an off chance I tried a store in the Burbank Mall and they had some. I got a black sandalwood one. They are so beautiful, so simple, yet so amazing. They don't have to be worn for religious purposes, anyone can use them. It is to help oneself with their intent and focus, a meditation tool. I won't pretend to know hardly anything at all, but I have been doing research over the years and more recently about what they are and what they mean. From my interpretation, they have been used many times throughout history. They are a tool for anyone to use to help each of us gain mindfulness and find our own personal Joy. 

They come is big and small, from bracelets to necklaces and even those range in shape, size, stone and color. Each one holds a different kind of energy and it is said that the person and their Mala pick each other, kind of like getting a wand in Harry Potter. I got a black sandalwood one for now, because I love the feel of the sandalwood on my fingers and the simplicity of it. I will probably order a pearl one later since pearl is my birthstone and a prayer/meditation chain connected like that would have a lot of energy between us to be held. That is being worked on as we speak. For now, I have my wooden ones and they are just fine with me. 

The use of Mala beads has been around for centuries and popped up in many a culture, above that it has lasted this long and is still thriving. Where is the power in that? It must have some spiritual power or significance. There are 108 beads plus the keystone and the tassel. Why 108? Well, it is not really known, but I have done some reading and compiling and to me this is what I get: "1" for whatever higher power or deity we believe in, "0" is for when we open ourselves up and become nothing except part of the world around us and lastly "8" for the infinite everlasting of that very world around us. 

Why have I gotten these beads do you ask? Because I am trying to focus more on myself and centering myself, focusing on my Joy and being a better happier person. Not just to benefit me, but for others around me too. I am hoping that this will become another tool to help me gain mindfulness, especially because it can mean pretty much whatever I need it to mean to me. It's really easy to do, you basically pick an "intent" to focus on or you use your mantra or code and you go from bead to bead repeating that mantra on each one, but repeating it with intent and thinking about just that. Being mindful of what you are doing. You go bead from bead moving around, you hold it in really either hand and move them with your thumb after you finish. When you get to the end you don't touch the keystone, you either turn back and go back around the other way or you stop. That is what I have come to understand and interpret and then tweak to make my own. Any input from you guys is more than welcome!!Please, try this with me, let me know what you think or if you do it already. I am truly hoping this will help me focus my intent and make me more mindful, especially of the things that are really bothering me. To me they are a symbol of hope and change and they remind me of my mantra, which I have finally decided on. I have also decided to wear it with me under my shirt, that way it won't be showy but it will still be on my skin and close to my heart where it belongs. It's always there to remind be of my mantra and what I am trying to accomplish. Reminding me of my Joy, my own personal Joy, and how to get there. 

Tattoo #7 - Targaryen Fire & Blood, Fire Cannot Kill A Dragon⚔🛡🐉🔥🐲🔥

"Fire cannot kill a dragon." A famous line from the series A Song of Ice and Fire by George R.R. Martin, it reminds me of a time that seems so long ago and how far I have come from there. How much stronger I am now. Not that I don't have plenty farther left to go. This next tattoo was going to be a sigil of strength, something to remind me of what I am strong enough to do. Now when I look down at my upper right arm it makes me want to flex my hand because I feel that strength. A symbol can be a very powerful thing, and it can mean very different things to very different people. Again that is the beauty of the individualism of Joy, we each have our own to pursue. My joy includes this three headed dragon, it's a part of me in a way. In a way that may seem hard for someone on the outside to understand. To someone else it may seem like just an obsession with a tv show or a passing craze, but to me it is more. 

When I was 17-years-old I went through a really really difficult time in my life and faced a lot of things that most people never have to face in a lifetime. After my first ever boyfriend/fiancé broke up with me and pretty much kicked me out I needed a lot of help and support. I sought out solace in the worlds I would find in books. My ex had introduced Game of Thrones to me when we were together because he was a huge fantasy nerd too. I thought they were really cool though, especially this character of Daenerys Targaryen. This young girl on the run with nothing but a family name must build a life from nothing. She is abused by her brother and sold off into marriage in order for him to gain an army. She went to her lowest point before she rose again. Even when her new life seemed perfect, her son on the way and her husband a strong warrior everything goes wrong and she loses it all again. The man she loved and the son she had living inside her. In return though she did gain three living breathing dragons from her three ancient dragon eggs, born from the fires of her sacrifice. Her story is much more detailed and goes on for much longer, but you get the idea. Her character, her voice, her pain all felt so tangible to me. It's like I could feel it in my soul, I identified with so many parts of her and admired so many others. She made me feel a little bit better, and her character inspired in me courage and strength that I really needed at that time in my life. 

Reading has always an important aspect of my life. From my mom reading to both my brother and I when we were in the womb to reading to us every day as we grew up until we learned how to read ourselves, we were always surrounded by books. When we were little we would get books on tape and read more than we watched tv. We spent so much time at the library reading, looking for books, getting online, joining book groups and so much more. I loved every second and it benefited me in more ways than I can express. It gave me an appreciation for reading that I still have. When I read a book it's like entering another world and the deeper you go the more attached you get. Becoming emotionally involved in a book is the whole point, why tell a story that doesn't make you think or feel anything? Reading these books I became attached to Daenerys Stormborn Targeryen and she began to mean something much more than just a character in a book. A symbol. 

The day I went to get it I remember being angry at another one of my exes, I could feel it flowing through my veins like fire. A fire that burned in my chest too. At this point I was probably 25 or 26 and living in West Hollywood, CA. I walked less than half a block up to Sunset Boukevard to get my tattoo in the shop directly across from the Viper Room and next to Whiskey-A-Go-Go. It was an amazing place and I got out all the hurt and pain. I channeled all my anger and frustration into that little needle and I put that symbol on my arm. It's been over ten years and I feel more connected to her character than ever as it still continues to evolve. She has left a lasting impression on me, for which I thank Mr. Martin. Thank you for giving me the hope I needed to keep going when all I wanted to do was give up. The three-headed-dragon is the sigil of House Targaryen, marking me as a dragon - and a symbol of strength. Strength from within. 

Reduce, Reuse = Recycle

I found this the other day when I was parking in a parking structure in Burbank, California. I saw the sign at first and glanced at it but I didn't really get what it was saying and I didn't have time to stop and go back. I couldn't stop thinking about it afterwards though and when I was finished and came back I took some time to explore and look around. I was curious about what was there around those concrete pillars and walls. Silly I know but something about it just stuck out to me as something neat and interesting and worth looking into. Something that showed mankind investing back into the world it had created in a positive way, or so I hoped. When I got back to the structure I looked at the sign. The boulders that are found all over and on both sides are actually repurposed from the Burbank landfill. It's kind of cool, to take something from an area of waste and putting it to good use where it actually looks good too. It reduces waste and reuses it at the same time, repurposing at its finest. The stones are filled in to imitate the actual California environment. That combined with the native draught-resistant plants makes this garden more than ideal. It requires less upkeep, it will stay nicer longer, it is more ecological friendly and it was done by reusing old waste products. That is seriously really cool. 

The City of Burbank Water & Power company did something inventive and smart, it is a Demonstration Garden to show just how effective they can be. That is what we constantly are, Demonstration Gardens, always showing to others and ourselves the potential that we know we have within. Sometimes it shines brightly through and sometimes it doesn't. Those times are when we really have to hold on to our Joy and what it means to us. We reduce and reuse by taking all of our past and letting it go. We don't just pretend it doesn't exist, we just have to deal with it and move on because in the end there is no way to go back in time and change things. There will never be a way. Deal with everything and don't let that waste, anger, stress, bile, depression build up until it has nowhere left o go except out - or inwards towards yourself. Use those mistakes and bad things and make them Joyful, you learned and survived and moved on. That really is something. Take the Joy you find with you and carry it with you throughout life, leaving gardens for you to visit from time to time when you need to moments. We are always demonstrating because we are never the same, always presenting something new and something exciting. Life is never the same, which is what makes it amazing. But that also means we can't go back in time either. We have to keep moving forward, stay strong and stay Joyful. Don't let things hurt you or weigh you down, let them make you stronger and then cast them to the side.