Tattoos #4 & #5 - Honor & Truth

For tattoo's #4 & #5 I decided to finish out the balance completely and get two more words, one on the top of each wrist to match the ones already on the bottom. So far I had "Love" & "Joy," what would work with those? I remember debating for a while, going back and forth. Trying to find that meaning, those special words that just spoke to me. One word I kept coming back to, "Honor." Something about the word, I just love how it sounds. I love how old the word is, the meaning and history behind it. When I think of "Honor" I think of Knights and Kings and the ability to truly have power to your name. A title conveys so much, more than only a label. To be called honorable is to convey so much more than just who you are but what you stand for. A man, or woman for that matter, of honor stands for truth, courage and what is right above any and all else. 

I wanted something for me, something to remind me of justice and what is right. Something to aim for in this life, a goal worthy of achieveing. What can be more fulfilling, for yourself and those around you, then living a life of honor? Honor is a term that isn't used much anymore; the values of integrity, honor and truth have gone by the wayside in the not so distant past. In a world that moves so quickly it is easier to focus only on yourself and your own needs. What makes you better than this world, being able to take a step above it, is putting others before yourself. We only have one life to live and one set of choices we can make. Living with honor means living according to what is right and not just what is easiest or more beneficial. It means to have respect for someone, and it is considered a privilege.

I wanted to be reminded to live a life not just for myself, but for what was right. For what was worth standing up for. If I only have one shot at this I want to make sure that it's worth it and that I truly can make a difference and show others that they can do so as well. It is a privilege to do the right thing, not an obligation. I have one legacy I leave behind and I won't let it be one of fear, cowardice, selfishness, guilt or having to finish at all costs. It's not about the end of the race, but how you run it. 

What do "Honor" & "Truth" have in common? Integrity, that was the link connecting the ideas I had in my head. I needed those reminders to act with integrity, the integrity I knew I had, even when faced with impossibly frustrating situations. I wanted a chivalrous token to remind me of the man I needed to be. Truth was acting with integrity as well, more so speaking with integrity. It is a hard thing to always tell the truth because the meaning and implication of truth are far reaching and never ending. We can not come back from the truth once we have been exposed and yet we can not really live at all if don't live in the truth. There is the truth we tell, there is the truth we believe and there is the truth we live. All three are consequentially one in the same, just unique to each of us. Finding this truth about ourselves is something that for most takes a lifetime, but if we are lucky we can find glimpses along the way of life. Holding onto those flashes of ourselves give us a glimpse of the true us and the true self we are striving to find and hold on to. I chose "Truth" to remind me of the inner Jeremy, the true me that would always be there. That's the self I couldn't lose, couldn't really betray or hurt. I put "Truth" on my right wrist opposite "Joy," to remind me that the Joy I seek everyday to keep me going is based on my true self and the only way to share that joy with the world around me is to use my true self. "Honor" went right where is belonged, opposite "Love" on the left wrist. Where else does love belong besides with honor I asked myslef? Honor is the defense of love pure and simple. I knew the things I wanted to be reminded of and I knew their importance. It more than felt right. I remember having them done by a good friend who was leaving town, before he left he did them both at the same time in his apartment where he had made a big clean space and sterilized all his tools. It was an awesome experience I will never forget, and finally having my wrists complete felt freaking great. 5 down - who knows how many more to go! 

A Dam Hard Time

One of the hardest things to gain in life is perspective. Most of the control over how we view the world is our own, although there are other factors involved as well. Other influences that distort our reality and perception. These distractions are both a part of life and creatures of our own invention. When we get angry, anxious, upset, depressed and whatever else it's like we are putting on different colored sunglasses. Like the ones that make everything look blue, or the ones with the added red tinting. After wearing them for a while taking them off is a shock for a second because you see that reality is much different than the way you viewed it through shaded lenses. The dangerous part is when we are wearing glasses and can't even tell. This is often how it unfolds because when you have anger, depression or anxiety controlling how you look at the world it often blinds you to it's power by consuming your every thought. We have to remain strong and diligent. We have to be careful and stay constantly vigilant in our search for joy. Don't let emotions control your every move and every decision. For me this is one of the hardest things to do. But the first step is waking up and realizing when you aren't seeing straight. Then you can start to do something about it. On our hike today we went over and around the Sepulveda Dam here in the valley. I love the concrete architecture, the grand scale and the stark contrast between the massive structure and the sprawling meadow and grasslands. I went up right next to the dam and took a panoramic picture. When I saw it on my phone it stopped me for a second. The dam was there but the perspective had been warped, as if wrapped around an invisible sphere. As the picture stretched on it straightened out and became normal again. From my spot the perspective was warped, my spot. It reminded me how so often I let my feelings and emotions control me and how I react to situations. Without seeing it I cause my own anxiety and misery. I'm the only one who can change my perspective back to normal. What blinds you? What burdens and emotions control your feelings and direction? Face them, even if you can't find the perfect way to fight them yet the first step is to stop and realize just how skewed your vision has become.